15 January, 2010

Come, join the SPBA!

Have you noticed, that ever since the economic liberalisation in the nineties, slowly but surely, public toilets in India have gone from the "Indian" style to western ceramic potty affairs. I think us Indians are great at aping all the bad things from the west and ignoring all the good things they have to offer. Bad thing: Western toilets. Good thing: If you're gonna have western toilets, you might as well have toilet paper. But, no. We just refuse to use toilet paper (spicy food?). Result: The public loos are sloshed floor to ceiling with water and so are the toilet seats as a result of the mug-and-water method. All this water is a dirt magnet with people walking in and out from all sorts of places with all sorts of stuff stuck to their footwear soles. When you really have to go, you're left debating whether to brave holding on or face the dirty loos. A great solution to this paper vs water problem would be a bum gun. Bum guns are the best invention ever in the history of humankind after fire, wheels and running water. Such a simble solution, but no takers. Come, help in the ridding of this social evil by joining the Society for the Propagation of Bum gun Adoption. It's a noble cause, and your karma shall be given positive credits, redeemable not only in your afterlife, but every time you use a public loo.